I GIVE YOU MY HAND

          Our family, and other families with a child or children with disabilities, often must deal with the isolation that is part of raising a child with special needs.  The “other world,” the so-called normal world that we move in, does not always make us feel that we belong in it.  There are the physical barriers, such as stairs or narrow doorways, that may make it impossible to access social activities.  There are also barriers that people unknowingly throw up that allow us to feel “different” and unwelcome.  These would include ignoring a child in a wheelchair, or scowling at a child with autism who acts inappropriately.

          We can only hope to change the world, one person at a time.  I have been involved in a sensitivity project at our church whose goal is to educate people to the emotional and physical needs of persons with disabilities.  One of the recommendations was to say hello directly to the special needs person and not just to that person’s caregiver.  In subsequent weeks, my husband and I were pleasantly surprised when many parishioners started to walk over to our son Danny, bend down to his level, and greet him warmly.

          Perhaps we can all educate the public, one person at a time.  Each and every encounter with the public is an opportunity to teach a person that our children are people first, and they happen to have a disability as well as many abilities.  When a curious youngster stares at your child, you can smile and encourage your son and daughter to introduce him or herself to him (if there are communication problems, feel free to act on your child’s behalf).  Answer any questions the youngster may have in a simple and straightforward way.

          Sometimes that “other world” seems so far beyond our reach and other times a kind word or gesture from a stranger breaks down those barriers and we walk (or roll) into the normal world with a lighter step.  No one wants to feel alone and keep in mind that most people have good hearts.  They just need to be guided in the right direction.  Maybe our world is their “other world.”  Take their hand if offered and offer your hand to them when needed.  Together we can someday create one world where we can all “walk” freely.

                                                                                             - - Joanne Dlugozima